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Today, 02:31 AM

? #1 (permalink)

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Join Date: Jun 2012

Posts: 211

Different degrees of addiction

Do you think there are degrees of addiction?? For example, H was in rehab over a year ago for cocaine addiction. 'Clean' for almost a year. Then relapsed about 4 months ago - he says only a few times using cocaine again - but now smoking hash daily. He arrived at my house last week (first real contact in 4 months - since he screamed at me to 'get the hell out of his life") . He did/said all the things I was warned about on SR. Declared his undying love; Promised he would never hurt my like that again; Said he screamed at me as he was trying to push me away as didn't want to hurt me; felt such shame; blah blah blah
The frightening thing is if it weren't for SR - I would have listened, and probably reasoned with myself that 'well as long as he is not using cocaine then it's okay' (Dear God where was my mind)....
But the question is - 'even though' he claims he is not using cocaine and 'only' smoking some hash' - is the nature of his addiction stil the same - would it be at that same dangerous, destructive level, it was when he went into rehab for cocaine???
He was in therapy (intensive) for 4 months - is it at all possible that he has not comletely 'relapsed' in the sense of his thinking and daily routine?
Or is he as sick as he was on cocaine? But just without the aggressive more 'obvious' signs of addiction when on cocaine??

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Today, 02:40 AM

? #2 (permalink)

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Join Date: Sep 2012

Location: London

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I think that addiction is all the same iam alcoholic but I know that if I start doing anything else that alters my state of mind I will eventfully get hooked it's my character. Obviously the drug of choice relates to behaviours for instance if I was hooked on cholocate cakes that's still self destructive but less destructive to my family than say alcohol or heroin. My point is that in order to be recovered we must be totally sober from any forms of mind altering substances! No levels of addictions one hole that we are all slipping down some are closer to the bottom than others, but it all heads to the same place... Hell.

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Today, 04:24 AM

? #3 (permalink)

Happy Thanksgiving Canada

Join Date: Mar 2002

Location: By The Lake

Posts: 27,559

Addiction is a progressive disease, it gets worse over time. Most active addicts I know who "cut back" to pot or beer or whatever their cut back drug was, were either lying or just putting in time until they were right back into their own drug of choice.

It doesn't get better until they stop. And they don't stop until they have tried everything possible to keep using, hoping nobody will notice...some die trying.

There are no "good drugs" or better than other drugs. They are all bad, they all take addiction to a dark and scary place, and they all lead to jails, institutions or death.

Hugs

Today, 05:15 AM

? #5 (permalink)

Belgian Sheepdog Adictee

Join Date: Apr 2004

Location: In Today

Posts: 5,341

He is using. He is a drug addict. Does not matter what mind altering
chemical it is he is NOT clean and sober. He Is Using!!!!

The only improvement for addiction is abstinence. He is not abstinent!

You are doing great, keep moving forward!!!!!

Love and hugs,

__________________

God Bless You All As You Trudge The Road
Of Happy Destiny (especially when you are
tridgin thru alligators up to your butt)
Sobriety: AA June 7, 1981
Codependency: Alanon June 7, 1984

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Today, 09:12 AM

? #6 (permalink)

The sun still shines

Join Date: Mar 2010

Posts: 299

It took me years of smoking cigarettes before I was fully addicted, but once addicted, even when I gave up I went right back to the same level of addiction I was at when I stopped. This was even the case when I gave up for 5 years. I believe other addictions work in the same way. Once you go down that slippery slope there is no stopping it.

__________________
If your happiness depends on your children being happy, that makes them your hostages. So stay out of their business, stop using them for your happiness, and be your own happiness. That way you are the teacher for your children: someone who knows how to live a happy life

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Today, 10:57 AM

? #8 (permalink)

Go O's!!

Join Date: Jun 2005

Posts: 3,032

Different drugs present themselves in various ways. But whether the associated behavior is violent, lying, cheating, stealing, nodding, depressed, manic, suicidal, sexual, non-sexual, or even just not participating in daily life or not meeting adult responsibilities?to me it is UNACCEPTABLE and I will not allow that in my life, nor settle for crumbs.

__________________
Nice words aren't always true.
True words aren't always nice.

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Today, 05:45 PM

? #9 (permalink)

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Join Date: Dec 2007

Location: Washington State

Posts: 3,692

I believe that there are "stages" of addiction very much like there are stages of cancer. Initially, it may not be noticed or simply referred to as someone who "likes to have fun". It progresses to having a few relationship problems or some issues with school or work. It continues to progress until it takes over an individual's life and becomes the focus of their existance. At least, this is what I have witnessed with my son's addiction.

It's progressive. You can't be considered in remission from cancer if you still have it "a little bit". Addiction is all or nothing. Either a person is using or they aren't.....they can't be "sort of using"........not when addiction is involved. In fact, most addicts, in their attempt to control that which they cannot control, go through a phase (one or many times) of trying to cut back or change the drug of choice to something they consider more acceptable (beer, pot, hash, etc.). These are the lies they tell themselves (and us) that keeps them (and us) in the cycle of addiction (and codependency).

But because it is progressive, they can't move backwards.....only forward in their addiction......or they can arrest it through abstinence (and hopefully recovery) to keep it from progressing.

Addiction is ugly. Addiction is tricky. Addiction causes addicts to lie to other people......but the worst lies are the lies they tell themselves.

gentle hugs
ke

__________________
"The essence of bravery is being without self-deception." ~ Pema Chodron

Today, 09:03 PM

? #10 (permalink)

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Join Date: Jun 2012

Posts: 211

Quote:

Needed to read that!!!!! Thanks Cynical One

Today, 09:05 PM

? #11 (permalink)

Member

Join Date: Jun 2012

Posts: 211

Quote:

These are the lies they tell themselves (and us) that keeps them (and us) in the cycle of addiction (and codependency).

But because it is progressive, they can't move backwards.....only forward in their addiction......or they can arrest it through abstinence (and hopefully recovery) to keep it from progressing.

Addiction is ugly. Addiction is tricky. Addiction causes addicts to lie to other people......but the worst lies are the lies they tell themselves.

gentle hugs
ke

Thank you KE!!